This forgotten Christmas song Friday hip hop edition post is strictly for the grown and sexy. Why? Because if you aren’t grown, you won’t know these old ass songs I’m about to reference. If you’re not sexy, well, go listen to that spoken word part of “Push It” by Salt and Pepa, and maybe you’ll understand. This post ain’t for everybody. Only the sexy people. So all you fly mothers, click on this effer and read…read I said! Ohbriggsy’s here and I’m in effect! And so on.
Ok so hip hop artists through the years have gotten in the Christmas spirit. Especially back in, as us old folks say, “the day.” Now, I’ve discerned in my travels that “the day” is used to refer to anything in the past ranging from last week to the late 70s, so to clarify, I’m talking about the 80s and early 90s. Aren’t I always?
So we all remember “Christmas In Hollis,” by Run DMC. That song, although awesome, isn’t forgotten, and is in fact a Christmas classic by now. Let’s listen to it though, shall we? And the actual video is on You Tube! Not some weird fan made video as per usual, but the real thing! This shit is awesome! Queens in the house! I lived there for 7 years so I gotta clap!
The video opens at Santa’s workshop in 1987. Kids who look like 2010 cool kids are being judged as naughty or nice by Santa, when an elf decked out in Adidas arrives to check in with the tired, overworked Santa. Santa leaves the elf, and the elf busts out the Run DMC and we get the story of Christmas in Hollis, Queens. Run discovers that Santa dropped his wallet with a million dollars inside, and then Run imagines purchasing what looks like a gypsy cab. Then DMC shows off his mom and what she’s cooking for the holiday. Then we have the whole gang hanging out with DMC’s mom, chilling on a recliner. Finally, Run, DMC and Jam Master Jay open their presents. Run gets an identical hat and gold chain to the ones he’s wearing. Party foul! Jam Master Jay gets new Adidas, and the elf is kicked out by DMC’s mom for opening up presents that weren’t his. In the end, Santa flies away in his Cadillac sleigh with his dog elf. This is a feel good video!
On a side note, remember how cool Run DMC was in grade school? You had to scrawl that logo on the back of your Mead notebooks or grocery bag book covers just so.
But Run DMC weren’t the first hip hop artists to celebrate the season. Way back in 1979, Kurtis Blow treated us to “Christmas Rapping.” Here he is performing it!
As I listened to “Christmas Rapping” I couldn’t help but hear that terrible song from the late 90s by that group Next. You know, “Too Close”? That song was truly awful! And the lyrics? Well, I’ll leave it up to you to listen to them carefully.
Then in 1988 there was another Christmas hip hop song, and I just discovered it this year. Here’s “Cold Chillin’ Christmas” by the Cold Chillin’ Juice Crew All Stars. From 1988. Yep, 1988! Pretty sweet! The Cold Chillin’ Juice Crew All Stars represented in this lil’ number were Big Daddy Kane, Roxanne Shante, and MC Shan.
Then in 1992 (Senior year!), TLC came out with a Christmas song, today’s forgotten song, “Sleigh Ride.”
In the “Sleigh Ride” video, we’ve got the requisite early ’90s large overalls, complete with condoms! T-Boz sticks with a pretty traditional “Sleigh Ride” verse about being comfy cozy and rosy cheeked. Then we get a Christmas rap from Left Eye (RIP). All the while, the ladies of TLC have a fun Christmas party. But they also give back in the true spirit of the season. Chili provides food for a blind man. T-Boz provides mistletoe for a bored older couple who then proceed to dance and otherwise get down. And Left Eye seems to do little ironing for a pregnant woman. That’s Christmas…on the TLC tip!
And hip hop artists continue to get Christmasy. Did you guys know that Kanye West just came out with a Christmas song this past Wednesday?
Yep, ‘Ye’s got the spirit! And we get treated to possibly the best line in a Christmas song for quite some time, here rapped by a fellow named Big Sean (Yes, I am old and white!): “Ok my white girl Veronica, black girl Monica, got me celebrating christma-honna-kwanaka. Rockin’ dashiki’s with a yarmulke.” You cannot deny this!
That’s what the kids call a “leak,” so if that link doesn’t work, it’s been taken down. If so, Google it, it’s pretty fun.
Happy last Friday before the Christmas holidays begin! What are you guys up to this weekend? Double S and I are throwing a Christmas party. Music, Christmas cocktails, and sweaters. Good times!